Words Hugo Harris Photography Greg Bailey

 "Crochet pocket pussy." The first three words to come out of Katya Zamolodchikova's mouth at our casual meeting together to discuss life as the world’s number one Transsexual Russian Prostitute. She sits with a can of coke clutched between her long orange nails. Her stature is that of a drag supermodel, tall, slim, flawless make-up, an outfit of pink and purple lazer cut spandex, finished with the elegance of a dog's identification tag which reads, Katya Vagabunda.

Why, "Crochet pocket pussy?" you may ask yourselves? Well I started off by congratulating this fair-headed temptress of the night on her first Christmas single, The 12 days of Christmas. "Oh, that crochet pocket pussy thing?" Katya exclaimed, “I haven't even listened to it yet; they wouldn't let me say Crochet pocket pussy. You know like, 'on the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me a crochet pocket pussy.' They said to me, would you like to be on this Christmas album and we will fly you to L.A tomorrow to record it? So I chose the 12 days of Christmas and I wrote everything on the plane and I had some funny stuff. When I then got to the studio they said to me, well these are great an everything but it needs to be like PG13. So I was then really worried that it wouldn't be funny, but oh well what are you going to do............?' 

I did have high hopes that her first single would be the lyrical wonder that is Ravioli. "I’m going to," Katya explained, "but I would like to do it as a true dance track. I would actually like to do a whole album where each song is going to be about foods, like pasta.........you know one of my favorite bands is Cibo Matto. Their first album Viva La Woman is just great, all about foods. It’s just so hard to do an album and I need help!"

We at Alright Darling opened the conversation up to all of our readers. We wanted you to ask any! And we meant any questions to Katya, whatever burning desire deep within your heart, or in some instances, a burning desire deep within your loins;

Big Dipper from Chicago asks: After I blow my load, why do you want me to stay inside you until I am soft and maintain strict eye contact the whole time?

Katya: "Well, I think its because it will be the closest thing to feeling like a real woman. Because I have always wanted to give birth to a very small child. In not so much say like a Freudian way more Woody Allen-ian. I will feel like the load is in there and then um......it’s like a physical sexual metaphor for our relationship. That this large powerful, explosive energy that is just dissolving and deteriorating and just sliding out into the world and I need to know that you are really there. That we are on the same page, like we are trudging into the darkness together. You know what I mean? Its 2016."

Roisin Mackinnon from Brighton asks: If you were a wrestler what would your finishing move be called?

K: "The Reluctant Squirt. Where I squirt an unhealthy amount of dehydrated urine in their eyes but I instantly feel bad about it. You know what I mean, like I don't want to do it but then I do it because it is going to make me win."

Francois Sagat from Paris asks: Katya, I have followed you since Drag Race aired, and have watched all of your Internet performances. Are you conscious that you are the most experimental drag act that ever existed in Drag Race and that you are psychologically extremely twisted, deep and fascinating? Also would you ever consider directing a short movie or long feature in which you could act in?

K: " I feel like I could die right now. Oh my God Francois Sagat! I don't even know how to answer that question. Well I would love to direct a short film to answer the second question. Like a short film I would love to do, it would be a black and white soap opera. It would have a lover returning, played by me, I’d be on a balcony or on the beach and then I would be coming in from the ocean, like walking through the ocean over and over. Lots and lots of repetition. Or a remake of The Hand That Rocks The Cradle with me playing every role but its hard because doing things like that costs a lot of money. I do realize I am twisted but that isn't necessarily a good thing for me. Ummmmm I just think this question makes me really happy, that is all I have to say. It is one of the best compliments anyone has ever paid me. It makes me feel so good. I’m going to have a really good night tonight. Oh my god I can’t even deal with it."

It was at this moment that I saw Katya's face become that of pure joy. Her eyes misted over to suggest tears but her smile was that of complete and utter happiness. It showed just how humble Katya is despite her high rising success since Season 7 of RuPaul's Drag Race... TO READ THE ENTIRE INTERVIEW FOLLOW THE LINK BELOW TO DOWNLOAD ISSUE TWO.


Issue two download featuring Katya, Jinkx Monsoon, Milk, Munroe Bergdorf, and Elliot Joseph Rentz AKA Alexis Stone.


Katya Bobblehead Dye Tee


Greg BaileyComment